CASUAL SEX: A SURFACE AFFAIR WITH HIDDEN CONSEQUENCES

Casual sex is often seen as a harmless indulgence, but beneath its fleeting pleasure lie deeper implications that affect the mind, body, and spirit. While sex is a natural and beneficial encounter when approached with care, engaging in it casually raises questions of purpose, self-worth, and dignity.

Understanding Casual Sex: 7 Key Insights

1. A Superficial Fulfillment – Casual sex satisfies the body but often neglects the emotions and deeper thoughts that arise afterward. The physical act may end, but the inner reactions linger.

2. Lacks Innocence and Grace – The essence of true humanity lies in purity and grace, qualities that casual encounters rarely reflect.

3. A Matter of Thought Priorities – Those who prioritize purity of thought and self-respect naturally steer clear of casual sex.

4. A Sign of Inner Emptiness – The endless pursuit of casual encounters may indicate a hidden struggle with self-worth. Serial conquests never truly satisfy; they only mask a deeper void.

5. Stripped of Dignity – Guilt, regret, and self-loathing often follow casual sex, eroding one’s self-respect and emotional well-being.

6. Devaluation of the Body – The body, like the soul, is sacred and must be treated with reverence—never exposed for attention or to entice. A misused body loses its sanctity and is vulnerable to exploitation by the tools of darkness. 

7. A Simple Truth: It Either Lifts or Lowers – No act is neutral. If casual sex does not uplift, it inevitably debases, and whatever debases diminishes one’s sense of self.

Conclusion: Choose Elevation Over Emptiness

Casual sex may seem like a momentary escape, but it often leaves behind a trail of emotional and spiritual consequences. True fulfilment stems from meaningful connections that nurture both body and soul. Surround yourself with relationships that uplift and enrich you rather than those that drain your spirit.

True intimacy uplifts; fleeting pleasure debases. 

Olusola Adeyegbe

#SelfWorth #DignityMatters #ElevateYourLife

IS A CROSSBEARER A SEEKER OF THE TRUTH?

 

Question: 

Is a Crossbearer a seeker of the Truth?

Response:

A Crossbearer is, by nature, a seeker of the Truth. Walking the path of the Grail Message means striving daily to recognize and live in accordance with the Laws of Creation, ever seeking spiritual enlightenment. The Crossbearer’s journey is one of conscious effort—purifying thought, word, and deed to align with the Will of the Creator as revealed by Abd-ru-shin. 

To bear the Cross is to embrace the responsibility of inner transformation, to strive for clarity, and to live in harmony with the unchanging laws that govern existence. In this, the Crossbearer finds not only guidance but also strength in continuously absorbing the Grail Message and adhering to it steadfastly, striving to live aright. 

LIVING IN LINE WITH LOVE, PURITY, AND JUSTICE 

The Crossbearer’s path is inseparable from Love, Purity, and Justice, as these are linked with the Laws of Creation. True seeking is not a passive longing but an active striving, requiring steadfast commitment to these principles in daily life. Love, in its purest form, is free from self-interest, radiating warmth and uplifting all that it touches. Purity ensures clarity in thought and deed, preventing the seeker from being clouded by base desires or material illusions. Justice, as woven into Creation, is not shaped by human opinions but stands firm as the incorruptible Laws of Creation—offering each individual the fruits of his own volition. A Crossbearer who consciously aligns with these pillars draws ever closer to the Truth, living in harmony with the Divine Order. 

THE STAND OF THE GRAIL MESSAGE ON THE CONCEPT OF THE “SEEKER” 

To understand the position of the Grail Message on the concept of a "seeker," reference to the term “Truth-Seeker” is found in the lecture The Conflict, where the author of the Grail Message, in describing the attitude of the intellectuals towards seekers, stated: 

“The unfounded and paltry nature of the attacks is always quite strikingly apparent from the very fact that these are never kept purely objective! They are always a veiled or open defilement of the person of the Truth-seeker. This is done only by someone who is incapable of replying objectively. After all, a seeker for the Truth or a bringer of the Truth does not give himself personally, but he brings what he says. 

The word must be examined, not the person! It is a habit of the intellectuals to seek always to regard the person first, and then to consider whether they can listen to his words.”

– I- THE CONFLICT 

CAN A CROSSBEARER COUNT HIMSELF OUT  FROM BEING A SEEKER? 

Can a Crossbearer exclude himself from the proclamations, calls, and exhortations in the Grail Message addressed to seekers? The answer lies in the very words of the Message itself: 

 “I am addressing earnest seekers only.”

– FOR YOUR GUIDANCE! 

“Therefore I once more urgently exhort you, seekers:‘Keep the hearth of your thoughts pure and then, above all, exercise the great power of silence if you wish to ascend.’”

– I-6. SILENCE 

“Everywhere there is night. Yet during the deepest affliction when everything, including what is better, is also in danger of sinking away, at the same time dawn will now break! But the dawn will first bring the travail of a great purification, which is inevitable before the salvation of all serious seekers can begin; for no helping hand can be offered to all those who pursue base ends!”

– I-18. WHAT SEPARATES SO MANY FROM THE LIGHT TODAY? 

These solemn calls in the Grail Message leave no doubt as to whom they are addressed. A Crossbearer cannot disregard the exhortations given to seekers. He is called to earnest striving, inner purity, and the strength to withstand trials and temptations, knowing that purification must precede ascent. The responsibility of a Crossbearer is one of active seeking and unwavering striving—not merely bearing the Cross in name, but bringing it to life through conscious deed.  

CONCLUSION 

Finally, one may ask: A Crossbearer is one who has come to conviction and recognition of Truth as proclaimed in the Grail Message. Can such a person still be called a seeker? My response to this with my present understanding is: Yes, a Crossbearer remains a seeker, but in a higher sense. Recognition of the Truth does not mark the end of seeking; rather, it deepens the responsibility of continuous striving. True conviction in the Grail Message is not a passive state—it is a living, unfolding process that demands ever-greater clarity, purity, and personal transformation. 

A seeker is one who actively strives for deeper understanding and alignment with the Laws of Creation. Even after coming to conviction, the Crossbearer must apply, refine, and embody the Truth in daily life. The author of the Grail Message warns against stand still, emphasizing that spiritual ascent requires constant movement. The moment one believes they have "arrived" and no longer needs to seek, they risk complacency and spiritual decline.

Thus, a Crossbearer is both one who has found and one who must continue to seek—not in uncertainty, helpless and uncertain  groping but in ever-deepening conviction and ever-purer striving.

Olusola Adeyegbe

WHY ARE THERE SO MANY CHRISTIAN DENOMINATIONS?

 

The existence of many Christian denominations, despite the common belief in Jesus, can be attributed to several factors:

1. Human Interpretation of Scripture – While Christians believe the Bible contains divine truth, people interpret it differently. Variations in understanding key doctrines—such as salvation, baptism, grace, and church governance—have led to the formation of different denominations.

2. Free Will and Diversity in Worship – Because humans have been endowed with free will, people express their faith in different ways. Some prefer structured, liturgical worship (e.g., Catholic or Orthodox), while others embrace  dynamic and spontaneous worship (e.g., Pentecostal or Charismatic).

3. Historical and Cultural Contexts – As Christianity spread across different cultures and historical periods, it adapted to local customs and traditions. This led to the development of distinct Christian communities that, while holding to the same core beliefs, differ in practice and emphasis.

4. Reformation and Church Authority – Throughout history, reform movements have challenged established church practices and doctrines. The Protestant Reformation, for example, led to the formation of many new groups as believers sought to return to what they saw as biblical Christianity.

5. Human Imperfections and Divisions – According to scripture  The apostle Paul warned against divisions (1 Corinthians 1:10-13), yet throughout history, disagreements—sometimes over major doctrines, sometimes over minor issues—have led to splits. Differences in leadership styles, governance, and priorities have contributed to the rise of denominations.

6. Unity in Essentials, Diversity in Non-Essentials – Many Christians believe that while there is one truth—Jesus Christ—different denominations are simply different expressions of faith. They agree on fundamental doctrines (e.g., Christ’s death and resurrection) but differ on secondary issues.

In conclusion and on a serious note, let us reflect that if all our efforts and desires are truly directed toward the pursuit of the Truth—Jesus Christ—then our differences would fade in the light of that singular goal. The divisions that have led to many denominations would no longer be necessary, for the Truth unites rather than divides. When we focus on the Truth proclaimed by Christ as the ultimate foundation of our faith, we will find that our paths, though varied, converge toward the same destination. True unity is not in labels or traditions but in a shared commitment to God's unchanging Truth, which leads us to love, righteousness, and eternal life.

May we all resolve to seek the Truth, for it is the Truth that sets us free!

Olusola Adeyegbe

#OneFaithOneTruth #UnitedInChrist #SeekingTheTruth

MANAGING A MARRIAGE WHERE ONE PARTNER IS MORE MATERIALLY SUCCESSFUL: A GUIDE FOR HUSBANDS AND WIVES

Question:

 

How should a husband manage a wife who is doing better than him? And how should a wife manage a husband she’s doing better than?

 

Response:

 

This is a huge test for any marriage. When one partner—especially the wife—is more materially successful than the other, it can create emotional, psychological, and relational challenges that require utmost good faith and understanding from both sides. However, I have seen this dynamic work beautifully when both partners embrace a shared vision, serve together, and honour each other.

 

For the Husband:

 

A man whose wife is more successful than him must develop emotional intelligence and self-assurance. Here’s how:

 

1. See Her Success as a Blessing, Not a Threat

 

Society often expects the man to be the primary provider, but times have changed. A wife’s success does not diminish her husband’s worth. Instead of feeling threatened, he should see it as a blessing to the family.

 

2. Let Go of Ego and Insecurity

 

Insecurity can breed resentment. If a husband begins to feel inadequate or competitive with his wife, it will only create tension. He must remind himself that his value is not tied to financial status but to his character, leadership, and love for his family.

 

3. Support and Celebrate Her

 

A confident man supports his wife's success wholeheartedly. He celebrates her wins, cheers her on, and does not feel the need to "outshine" her. This strengthens their bond and makes her feel even more connected to him.

 

4. Find His Own Strength and Purpose

 

Success is not only measured by financial achievements. A husband should focus on excelling in his own strengths, whether in his career, personal growth, or family leadership.

 

5. Know When to Let Go and Adapt

 

There will be moments when he must swallow his pride and let things go. Harsh words may come, and his ability to remain calm and flexible will determine how strong their relationship remains. He should be like water—flowing with situations without losing his essence.

 

 

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For the Wife:

 

A woman who is more successful than her husband must handle the situation with wisdom, grace, and maturity to ensure her marriage remains strong and loving.

 

1. Respect Him, No Matter What

 

The most crucial thing a wife can do is to honour her husband. Even if she earns more, she should never make him feel small or irrelevant. A man needs to feel respected, and how she treats him will define his confidence in the relationship.

 

2. Avoid Making Him Feel Less of a Man

 

Subtle words or actions can make a man feel undermined. She should be mindful of how she speaks about finances, decision-making, and leadership in the home.

 

3. Let Him Lead Where He Excels

 

Leadership in a marriage is not only about money. A wise woman allows her husband to lead in areas where he is strong—whether in parenting, family decision-making, or emotional support. This helps maintain balance in their relationship.

 

4. Practise Patience and Wisdom

 

There will be moments when tensions rise, and words may be exchanged. She must learn when to be silent and let things settle. The ability to hold back unnecessary arguments can save a marriage from avoidable conflicts.

 

5. Relinquish the Need for Control

 

When a woman is more successful, there may be a temptation to control things in the home. But for the marriage to thrive, she must allow her husband to be himself, love him for who he is, and let go of the need to dictate every aspect of their lives.

 

 

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A Shared Responsibility

 

While the advice above is directed at husbands and wives respectively, both partners can benefit from applying these principles. Marriage thrives when mutual respect, understanding, and self-awareness guide interactions.

 

 

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The Biggest Challenge: Anger

 

One of the most dangerous threats to a relationship in this situation is anger. Whether it is the husband feeling disrespected or the wife feeling frustrated, anger can quickly poison the marriage.

 

A husband who reacts in anger may say things he regrets or withdraw emotionally.

 

A wife who allows anger to take root may become dismissive or controlling.

 

 

Both must learn to control their emotions. The moment anger rises, they should remind themselves:

 

 "If I allow anger to take over, I am still immature. I still have a lot to learn. And worse, I can be manipulated by negative forces—by the darkness!"

 

 

 

If they can remember this, they will learn to "cool temper" and handle situations with wisdom rather than emotion.

 

 

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Final Thoughts:

 

Marriage is a partnership, not a competition. When one person is doing better, it is an opportunity for the couple to support each other, not tear each other down.

 

With understanding, flexibility, patience, and self-control, both husband and wife can navigate this challenge and build a stronger, more fulfilling relationship.

 

Olusola Adeyegbe

 

 

THE WAR OF THE SEXES: MYTHS VS. REALITY

The so-called war of the sexes is an age-old battle—one that has fueled countless debates, inspired literature, shaped cultural narratives, and, at times, driven wedges between men and women. At its core, this "war" stems from differences in expectations, experiences, and societal conditioning, leading to broad generalizations and, unfortunately, deep-seated misunderstandings.

A Story as Old as Time

Throughout history, men and women have played different roles in society. Traditional gender norms often dictated that men were providers and protectors, while women were caregivers and nurturers. However, as societies evolved, so did expectations. With increasing gender equality, shifting relationship dynamics, and changing economic realities, new tensions have emerged.

Some men argue that they give their all—financially, emotionally, and physically—only to be betrayed or underappreciated. On the other hand, many women express frustration at being undervalued despite their contributions to relationships and family life. This mutual sense of grievance fuels the "war," often leading to blanket statements that paint one gender as victims and the other as villains.

The Problem with Generalizations

A common narrative in certain circles is that men who invest in women—train them, treat them well, and provide for them—will ultimately regret it. Such views, often backed by painful personal experiences, are presented as universal truths rather than what they are: individual stories.

But if we flip the script, we find that women, too, have similar grievances. Many women have supported men financially, emotionally, and otherwise, only to be abandoned when the man becomes successful. This cycle of disappointment exists on both sides. The truth is simple: betrayal and ingratitude are human flaws, not gender-specific traits.

The Case for Self-Investment

One of the more reasonable takeaways from these debates is the importance of self-investment. Both men and women should prioritize their personal growth, financial independence, and emotional well-being. A person who is fulfilled on their own is less likely to enter relationships out of desperation or a need for validation.

However, the idea that doing good for others—especially for the opposite sex—is a mistake is flawed. The problem isn’t kindness or generosity; the problem is misplaced expectations. When we do good with the hope of securing loyalty or reciprocity, we set ourselves up for disappointment. Instead, we must choose wisely whom we invest in, understanding that character, not gender, determines a person’s ability to appreciate and reciprocate goodwill.

The Role of Empathy and Forgiveness

Perhaps the most underrated tool in resolving the so-called war of the sexes is empathy. When people wrong us, it is often due to ignorance, emotional immaturity, or personal struggles rather than sheer malice. Recognizing this doesn’t excuse bad behavior, but it does help us process it differently.

When we let go of resentment and choose to learn rather than harden our hearts, we free ourselves from the weight of past disappointments. Forgiveness doesn’t mean forgetting; it means refusing to let the actions of others define our future interactions.

Moving Forward: A Call for Balance

Rather than fueling gender-based grievances, we must strive for balance. Yes, people—both men and women—can be selfish, ungrateful, and deceitful. But they can also be kind, loyal, and loving. The key is discernment—choosing relationships wisely, setting healthy boundaries, and maintaining realistic expectations.

At the end of the day, the war of the sexes is only as real as we allow it to be. If we approach relationships with wisdom, maturity, and a willingness to understand rather than blame, we will find that cooperation, not conflict, is the true path forward.

Conclusion

The best way to navigate life is not with bitterness but with wisdom. Invest in yourself, give freely but wisely, and understand that not everyone will appreciate your kindness. Still, that should never stop you from being a good person. The world needs more of those.

Olusola Adeyegbe 

#Relationships #Wisdom #Empathy

LIVING AS PRIESTS AND KINGS: BALANCING THE SACRED AND THE MUNDANE

Life is a delicate balance of the spiritual and the earthly. Each of us is both a Priest and a King, called to fulfill our duties in both realms without neglecting either. We cannot afford to be one-sided; a life that prioritizes only the material will lack depth, while one that is solely spiritual may fail to engage with the realities of daily existence. True fulfillment comes from embracing both roles with wisdom and commitment.

The words of Christ guide us: "Render unto the Emperor that which is due to the Emperor, and unto God that which is due to God!"This instruction highlights the necessity of balance. We must engage with the world, honoring our responsibilities as workers, leaders, and contributors to society. At the same time, we must cultivate our spiritual lives, deepening our connection with the Almighty and striving for moral excellence.

A king governs, takes charge, and provides, ensuring that earthly responsibilities are met. A priest, on the other hand, seeks divine wisdom, intercedes for others, and nurtures the soul. Neither role should be played at the expense of the other. If we neglect our priestly calling, we risk becoming lost in materialism, chasing fleeting success. If we abandon our kingly duty, we may become detached from reality, failing to make a tangible impact in our world.

Ultimately, while we must attend to both, we must give priority to spiritual growth. At our core, we are human spirits navigating a temporary earthly journey. Our kingly duties are tied to the earthly journey and to facilitate it, but our priestly essence—our connection with the Divine—endures beyond this life.

The challenge, then, is to walk this path with intention: to rule wisely in our earthly affairs while remaining steadfast in our spiritual pursuit. Only in this harmony do we truly live as we were meant to—both Priests and Kings.

LIVE FULLY. RULE WISELY. WALK SPIRITUALLY.

Olusola Adeyegbe 

#PriestAndKing #BalancedLiving #SpiritualWisdom

BREAKING FREE FROM THE PAST: DEALING WITH MOCKERY FROM CLOSE FRIENDS AND FAMILY

Q: What should I do when close friends or relatives mock me for trying to change and live a better life?

A: When you decide to improve yourself, it’s unfortunate but common for some close friends or family members to remind you of past mistakes in an attempt to hold you back. This often stems from their own insecurities, jealousy, or discomfort with your growth. They may fear change, especially when it highlights their own stagnation.

Q: Should my past define me?

A: Absolutely not! As human beings, we have both the right and the duty to evolve into better versions of ourselves. Our past mistakes do not determine who we are today or who we can become tomorrow. Growth is a natural part of life, and we should never let past failures stop us from striving for a better future.

Q: How should I handle negative opinions about my transformation?

A: What others think about you is none of your business. Their opinions should not distract you from your new goals and values. Stay focused, stay committed, and remember that their words do not define your progress—you do.

Q: What does their mockery really say about them?

A: Their mockery reveals more about them than it does about you. It shows their unwillingness to accept that people can change and grow. In many cases, it’s their way of trying to keep you at their level because your progress makes them uncomfortable.

Q: Could their mockery be proof that I’m actually changing?

A: Yes! If they truly believed you hadn’t made any progress, they wouldn’t feel the need to mock you. The fact that they are reacting means they see your growth and feel challenged by it. Instead of seeing their words as discouragement, take them as confirmation that you’re on the right path.

Final Thoughts:

Keep evolving. Keep growing. Let the mockery be nothing more than background noise in the story of your transformation. You are not your past—you are your progress!

Olusola Adeyegbe 

#PersonalGrowth #RiseAboveNegativity #StayFocused #NewBeginnings #IgnoreTheHaters #CharacterDevelopment #BecomingYourBestSelf #KeepEvolving