Already at birth every human being brings along certain qualities which can be further developed through working together with others with matching qualities. These matching qualities are not identical but they complement each other and in completing each other they bring about the full value of the various qualities. So, when such persons that so complement each other get together in marriage it can be said they are suited for each other. They will live in harmony and the happiness and permanence of their marriage is assured from the very start. Such is the marriage which has been made in heaven!
In order to find this very special person with whom one can enter into a harmonious marriage, one needs to exercise the necessary seriousness, keeping eyes, ears and heart open and above all giving up all those conditions which have so far been demanded for a marriage. Mercifully for each person there are several others who possess the qualities to complement each other and so with care and looking up to the Will of God it is not necessary that one looks for too long to find that ideal match.
It must be noted however that working together and having the same high aims are indispensable for a sound marriage. I speak here of having as goal the spiritual development of the people in love and not merely coming together to start a joint rat race to acquire earthly wealth with a life of comfort as the crown of all the efforts.
We now address the second part of the question. Apart from being a result of lustful adventures, one may put oneself in such position if after mutual commitments before or after marriage, the partners continue looking around selfishly. Having found that person with complementing qualities, each must exercise necessary care and restraint.
Remember that there are several others with matching qualities as we mentioned earlier. So, if care is not taken, on meeting one of such, the careless wanderer may find himself or herself in the very awkward position of being entangled with more than one person! With such a happening however, three people might get hurt and afflicted with serious inner conflict. The person who started the dangerous adventure should blame his/her careless behaviour for bringing this about. Each person in a harmonious relationship should therefore remain faithful. This is how to ensure that no one does anything that will harm or later oppress the other. The reward for this is inner peace and happiness!
Post Script.
I must admit that it is an uphill task to just stick to the person beside you. There are a few hints however which we all can use.
1. Think of the result of the indiscretion. The harm to more than one person (sometimes indelible damage). Too many issues to deal with already in this world and not wishing to add more! Love life, be like a child, and don’t court trouble. Know your limits and don’t cross your boundaries.
2. We must realize that being alert is an everyday job. A bird can land on your head but cannot stay there unless you allow it stay! So, temptations can come but will only overwhelm us if we allow it to happen that way. If despite all caution, we fall, let us get up briskly and move on resolving to be better at it going forward. Not giving up but learning from each fall.
3. Look upwards in prayer for help. Remember the admonition to watch and pray.
We all shall succeed!
1 comment:
The topic is such that should get any serious thinker pondering, especially in societies where polygamy and multiple partnerships is commonplace and culturally tolerated.
May we be helped to avoid the certain pitfall that is inherent in this harmful practice.
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